Back in the cafe... Rimas was giving Cae an earful for spraying her with a fire extinguisher.
This was not the first time these two had been at odds.
Cae and Rimas were, for all their differences, birds of a feather.
By this I mean... They both loved to talk.
And they both hated to listen.
Marcel couldn't help but laugh as these two went at it.
This was not the first time these two had been at odds.
Cae and Rimas were, for all their differences, birds of a feather.
By this I mean... They both loved to talk.
And they both hated to listen.
Marcel couldn't help but laugh as these two went at it.
.png "You could just search up a recording of an angry raccoon and an angry skunk and play both videos over each other and it would sound pretty much like this image.")
Marcel looked back and forth between Rimas and Cae, listening to their "argument".
He didn't understand all of the words they used.
But, he figured they must be good ones.
He relaxed, delighting in the opportunity to remain blamelessly neutral.
He didn't understand all of the words they used.
But, he figured they must be good ones.
He relaxed, delighting in the opportunity to remain blamelessly neutral.
Rimas: So instead of politely asking me to stop, you just unload a canister of cold foam on me? Look at my clothes, my hair, it’s... Kyah! I’m going to have to go all the way home and change clothes! Do you have any idea how much that hurt? Have you ever been hit by a fire extinguisher? No, I bet you haven’t! Because if you had, how could you inflict such pain on someone else? You heartless creature, you wretch, you priggish, sanctimonious pedant! Grovel? GROVEL?? I hope to the gods above you’re never granted even one iota of authority nor responsibility, for I know beyond a shadow of a doubt you would take the inch you’re given and strap all beneath you in for a mile of torment. Oh, your military service! An endless rigamarole of minutia and trifles, little barbs of satisfaction! I’m sure your twisted need for control and dominion gorged on that buffet of regiment! You self-important little barhop, no one cares about your military service! Do you have even the slightest inkling of the power I now wield, the forces that bend to my infinite will? SHRIMP??? Your entire bloodline shall know my fury, they shall know it is your fault they bear the burden of my wrath! You IMPUDENT, PILFERING, MANGLED, LOATHSOME GARBAGE EATER!
Cae: Oh so I’m in the wrong for trying to keep you from burning this entire building to the ground with all of us in it? I’m in the wrong for making sure that your building doesn’t go up in smoke? Forget yelling at me, you should be thanking me, you should be groveling at my foot! Oh, oh!! You wanna talk to me about pain? Okay, let’s talk pain. Look at my legs! Look! Do you see anything strange? I got my right foot blown off by a god-damn landmine! An honest to god landmine! Do you think that was fun? Do you think I hopped away from that on my remaining foot thinking "golly what a thrill"? No! The pain was so bad I passed out as soon as I finished dragging the body from the crater! Well excuse me for wanting rules to be followed! There’s a thing called the social contract which we as individuals must follow in order to maintain this little thing we call a society! Little! Look who’s talking, you shrimp out of water! Oh, I’m so scared. Keep talking! Keep talking, this is so good for my self-confidence, knowing I’m not a pathetic psychopath like you! I’m gay, dumbass! I’m not having any kids!... You NOISOME, MEPHITIC, EFFUSIVE, EFFLUVIENT PRATING MIASMA!
Marcel:
Hahaha!! Cae! Cae, oh man...
Rimas is the skunk... But you sprayed her!
Get it? Instead of the other way around! God, that's hilarious.
Hahaha!! Cae! Cae, oh man...
Rimas is the skunk... But you sprayed her!
Get it? Instead of the other way around! God, that's hilarious.
Marcel, don't you dare encourage him! This is assault. I'll sue!
You were doing magic. You don't want that brought up in court.
You'd serve way more time than I would.
You'd serve way more time than I would.
Damn it... You're right. You better not snitch on me! Or I'll...
.png "Marcel isn't mocking Cae, he just has a habit of mimicking body language.")
Marcel!! Good! I knew you'd take my side eventually!
Kill him.
Kill him.
Drop it, Reem. I just got up to go wash my hands.
You both broke at least one law, I'd wager.
So let's just call it even and move on with our lives, huh?
You both broke at least one law, I'd wager.
So let's just call it even and move on with our lives, huh?
Well, you heard big boy. Go change then.
You know what, no, we are not even.
I won't sue if you give me a refund for the coffee you ruined.
I won't sue if you give me a refund for the coffee you ruined.
No.
A voucher for a free meal!
Are you kidding?
An apology!
For what, basic fire safety?
A... a refill on the coffee? I… I didn’t get to finish it...
I really enjoyed the balance of aroma and flavor.
How full the taste was, the delicate balance of bitterness and sweetness...
I really enjoyed the balance of aroma and flavor.
How full the taste was, the delicate balance of bitterness and sweetness...
Will you give it a rest already? This is pathetic, you're a grown woman.
No one's going to take pity on y-
No one's going to take pity on y-
Sal:
Consider it done, Ms. Nolie.
Consider it done, Ms. Nolie.
Sal! Don't encourage her behavior!
.png "All shall abide my will, Cae. ALL.")
He understands me. He understands the importance of my work.
This is why, when I bring about the apocalypse, he shall be spared.
But, you...? You have some work to do, Mister Lawrence.
This is why, when I bring about the apocalypse, he shall be spared.
But, you...? You have some work to do, Mister Lawrence.
The only work I've got to do is in therapy...
Undoing whatever your continuous presence here has done to my sanity.
... I'm sorry I sprayed you with a fire extinguisher.
That was... a bit of an overreaction on my part.
Go change.
I'll clean up your table so it'll be nice and clean when you get back.
Undoing whatever your continuous presence here has done to my sanity.
... I'm sorry I sprayed you with a fire extinguisher.
That was... a bit of an overreaction on my part.
Go change.
I'll clean up your table so it'll be nice and clean when you get back.
Okay, okay, stop being nice to me! It's creepy.
I... forgive you, Cae.
I'm sorry I made fire in here. I'd do it over at the bookstore, but...
I've got books over there. Very flammable. Can't risk it.
I... forgive you, Cae.
I'm sorry I made fire in here. I'd do it over at the bookstore, but...
I've got books over there. Very flammable. Can't risk it.
You know it'd be safest to just do that outside, right?
I forgive you, too. Now will you go change already?
I forgive you, too. Now will you go change already?
Just then, Cae's younger sibling Frost entered, followed by Ikal.
Frost and Ikal were in good spirits after Ikal's success, on film.
Frost immediately started looking for Rimas.
Frost and Ikal were in good spirits after Ikal's success, on film.
Frost immediately started looking for Rimas.
Frost:
Everybody make way for Mister McTwister!
Everybody make way for Mister McTwister!
Oh for fucks sake, what now?
.png "My boyfriend is the coolest person in this entire building.")
Frost found Rimas quickly, as she happened to be near the front door.
Rimas lives upstairs from the Cafe.
The stairs are on the opposite side of the bookstore.
Rimas lives upstairs from the Cafe.
The stairs are on the opposite side of the bookstore.
Oh hey, Ms. Nolie! Ikal landed a McTwister on the halfpipe!
I got the whole thing on video! Check it out!
I got the whole thing on video! Check it out!
Ikal:
Rimas, what the heck are you covered in?
Soap suds? What? Why soap?
Rimas, what the heck are you covered in?
Soap suds? What? Why soap?
I'd love to stick around, but your brother went absolutely insane.
He sprayed me with a fire extinguisher because he's nuts and also unstable.
I forgave him, because I know he has it in him to be a good person...
He just needs a little help now and then, y'know?
He sprayed me with a fire extinguisher because he's nuts and also unstable.
I forgave him, because I know he has it in him to be a good person...
He just needs a little help now and then, y'know?
What the hell is your problem? I thought we were square.
You sprayed our hero with a fire extinguisher?
Is today "Drive Cae up a Goddamn Wall Day" or something?
.png "I wish I had a younger sibling like Frost. Cae takes them for granted!")
Stick around, Frost! I'll be right back to give my professional appraisal.
Keep your poor misguided brother company while I'm gone, okay?
Your hero will return!!
Keep your poor misguided brother company while I'm gone, okay?
Your hero will return!!
Rimas spun around and took off towards the bookstore, a spring in her step.
You always do this.
Today's the first time I've sprayed anyone with a fire extinguisher, actually.
It's...
Sigh...
Not the fire extinguisher, it's just...
You drive people away. My friends.
This happens whenever I try to reach out. I want to learn from your generation!
There's so much they have to teach. So much!
You're part of them and you don't see!
Sigh...
Not the fire extinguisher, it's just...
You drive people away. My friends.
This happens whenever I try to reach out. I want to learn from your generation!
There's so much they have to teach. So much!
You're part of them and you don't see!
.png "They do this multiple times a week.")
Ikal took Frost's rollerblades and camera, and his skateboard, and sat down.
He took the booth behind where Marcel had been sitting.
Meanwhile, Cae tried to calm Frost down, with mixed results.
He took the booth behind where Marcel had been sitting.
Meanwhile, Cae tried to calm Frost down, with mixed results.
She used fire magic, and she would've burned down the cafe.
I was just folowing protocol for putting out fires.
I was just folowing protocol for putting out fires.
Protocol??
That's what you blame?
You priggish, sanctimonious pedant!
That's what you blame?
You priggish, sanctimonious pedant!
... Did you two trade notes or something?
You always hide your individual responsibility behind some social contract!
You can never just admit you were wrong!
You can never just admit you were wrong!
I literally did that, like, five seconds before you showed up.
I apologized to her, she apologized back, we forgave each other.
Rimas even told you she forgave me. Remember?
I apologized to her, she apologized back, we forgave each other.
Rimas even told you she forgave me. Remember?
You wanna come back behind the counter, Mr. Firefighter?
Or am I gonna have to come out there?
And you, mini Lawrence, cut the ruckus.
Or am I gonna have to come out there?
And you, mini Lawrence, cut the ruckus.
Audrey:
Ooooo, you're in trouble...
Ooooo, you're in trouble...
Don't you start rubberneckin'.
Cut me some slack, dude!
I'm an owl, rubberneckin's what I do best!
'Sides, you don't expect me to pass up the free entertainment, do ya?
I'm an owl, rubberneckin's what I do best!
'Sides, you don't expect me to pass up the free entertainment, do ya?
So, you're telling me Rimas riled me up on purpose?
You've been had, kiddo.
Curses!!
Curse her and her wiles!
I'm going to bother her so much, later.
Curse her and her wiles!
I'm going to bother her so much, later.
Well, you have my blessing to do so.
Anyway! Welcome to Moonbrew Cafe.
What can I get you today?
Anyway! Welcome to Moonbrew Cafe.
What can I get you today?
This was, in many ways, a standard Yenday afternoon for the cafe.
Cae moved back behind the counter, Audrey returned to the grill, and Frost sat down with Ikal.
The regulars carried on studying, eating, and drinking as though nothing were amiss.
Rimas then made her way through the bookstore.
There, her bewildered and overworked assistant had to reckon with her sudden appearance.
Cae moved back behind the counter, Audrey returned to the grill, and Frost sat down with Ikal.
The regulars carried on studying, eating, and drinking as though nothing were amiss.
Rimas then made her way through the bookstore.
There, her bewildered and overworked assistant had to reckon with her sudden appearance.
